Why Did I Write This Book?

I have had a ton of experiences; I believe I’ve had more experiences of different kinds than a lot of people have. Good things have happened, as well as a bunch of rough stuff, and there are lessons to be learned from each. If I share these “wisdoms,” maybe I can help other people. A lot of the concepts in this book are mine and originated with me; but many are also things I have heard along the way and thought were so smart that I incorporated them into my life and my thinking. I wish I could identify the originators of the thoughts that I’ve borrowed so I could credit them, but you hear something over the decades and it just becomes part of the fiber of all that you are. So, I apologize to those folks who are not credited with some of these ideas. But know too that I thank them for allowing me to pass on their wisdom.

So much of what is in Gather as You Go is simply common sense. One of my favorite sayings is, “Common sense is instinct. Enough of it is genius.” (George Bernard Shaw). The idea is to pass it on. This is all about sharing and learning, and I hope that if you take just a couple of things from this book that are meaningful to you, your life might just be a little stronger, better, happier, or healthier—or you may just think a little differently about what life throws at you. I wrote this book as a gift to my children, my friends, their friends, and especially for young people. And a comment to my male friends, mentors, and colleagues: you might peruse these pages, see the whimsy in the illustrations, and think there are not too many stories relevant to men. But if you dig a little deeper, you’ll find many stories about business, leadership, branding, tough times, raising kids, philanthropy, and more.

I am sure that if I had time to read multiple books on each of the many topics I have included, there would likely be nothing new offered here. But the fact is, I don’t have that time, nor do most people. So, this is just a little bit on a lot of life’s stuff.

And when you read this book and say to yourself, “Gosh, I already knew that, but she should have said this,” I would say to you: write your thoughts down and pass them on. We all have gathered so much in our lives, and I used to think people knew most of what I knew. But then people kept pushing back and telling me to write a book. And so I did. And you might just think about writing a book too. If you do, please send me a copy. I would love to read it.

I have been pushed by the people who helped me to edit this book to share some of the reasons why I have the credibility to write it. I can’t stand people with big egos, and I have a hard time even writing these words, but I do so by way of explanation of all that I share. On the wonderful, positive, incredibly lucky side, I was privileged to work for more than three decades for the Alberto Culver Company, where I conceived and developed Mrs. Dash, Static Guard, Baker’s Joy, and Molly McButter. Alberto owned Sally Beauty Company; with 2,400 stores, we were the largest retailer of beauty supplies in the world. I led our consumer products business for more than a decade and instituted a cultural overhaul that improved our business and growth trajectory; that story was published by the Harvard Business Review. I went on to become executive chairman of the board of directors. Alberto was a family-controlled company listed on the New York Stock Exchange. My father was likely the oldest living founder ever to turn over a business to the second generation—not easy. Lots more on that in the book. We sold Alberto Culver to Unilever in 2011. I have served on the board of directors of Northwestern Memorial HealthCare, one of the top health systems in the country, and am privileged to be the immediate past chair and the first woman to serve in that role. I am a vice chair of the board of Tulane University and have lived through Hurricane Katrina and the rebuilding of New Orleans and the university. I started a charity that has raised millions of dollars for Prentice Women’s Hospital. I serve on three other great charity boards. I am most proud to have been recognized as “National Working Mother of the Year” by the Moms In Business Network and will tell everyone that, without question, my three kids have always come first in my life. I manage our family’s assets and charitable foundations. I had high-risk pregnancies and lost a baby at seven months’ gestation, and I spent six months in bed with each of my last two pregnancies. My oldest son had kyphosis and had to wear an awful Milwaukee brace for a couple of his high school years. My gorgeous older brother died of a drug overdose. I have lived through an awful, very public divorce. I met the love of my life, Bobby, two years after my ex-husband and I separated (one month after my divorce was final), and we were incredibly happy together for eight years. He died of brain cancer in February 2016. I have three wonderful, accomplished, “normal” children, and despite being three-plus years apart, they all decided to get married within a span of nine months—and I planned all three weddings. That was harder than opening a new factory or launching a national brand. And I am incredibly lucky to now have six precious grandchildren age three and under. In my spare time, I love to decorate and throw (incredibly fun) parties. My dad is ninety-seven years old and is still my best friend.

I am sure you have heard the words “lifelong learning,” and for me that is so incredibly true. Someone helps me to learn something new almost every day. Sometimes it’s the light stuff about parties or trips, but most of the time it is about business as that is most of what I do. Other times it’s unfortunately about something so hurtful to my heart that I don’t want to learn anything more. But most of the time the learnings are good ones. And so I pass it on.

Throughout the book I return, again and again, to the value of friendship—with those people who stand by you in the good and bad times, amplifying the good in unexpected ways and abating the difficult in ways that will hold special meaning in the years to come. I have been incredibly fortunate to know so many fabulous people. Midway through writing this book, I decided to ask several of them to write introductions to chapters that I felt fell within their areas of expertise or revolved around issues that would have special meaning to them. I expected a few lines on how our lives had intersected and some thoughts on how the topic of the chapter touched them. What I received back was careful, caring, deeply thought-out sharing of their wisdom, which in each case could well be the basis for a freestanding book. Each introduction serves as a reminder to me of the enduring value of friendship. I want to express my deep thanks to these wonderful friends who were willing to add greater depth to this book; you will get to know them in the chapters ahead.

Along the way, I’ve given a lot of thought to how all of this should be arranged. But, like life, it doesn’t fall into any neat order. Sometimes a crisis interrupts the best-laid plans. There are days when kids or grandkids take precedence, and there are other days when your focus is demanded elsewhere. Some days you just feel like throwing a party—and some days you don’t. 

So, I haven’t concentrated too hard on a plan or a narrative flow to weave all these disparate life parts together. I have kind of treated it like life: take it as it comes. The “Contents” page gives you a map so you can start with the sections that most interest you or might have the most meaning to where your life is today. Personally, I hope you’ll come back to some of the other sections as well and perhaps find a surprise lesson, a warning, or even a smile where you might not expect it.

Most of all, in reading about my experiences, may you find something that has meaning to you, as it all has had great meaning to me.

C.L.B.